Who Do I Have to Schtupp Around Here for a Raise?

13 Lucky Secrets To Success The Devil Taught Me... And I Didn't Even Have to Sell My Soul.

You don't have to sleep with the boss or his wife to get a raise.

Shocking, I know.

Most of my readers have a job, need a job, a raise, or a promotion. In all these cases, they also need a job creator.

They need a hero. Someone they can schtupp for a raise, if you believe Hollywood's version of events.

And that means they need a man who can negotiate with the "money men", the bankers, investors, and negotiate better than they do, or else there won't be any money to hike up your skirt for. You'll be working for free. And that just sucks. Especially when you do.

Most workers suck, if you believe Drucker. They're toxic. Especially since they started hiring more and more women and minorities, the number of workers who suck has mysteriously increased. I'm sure there's no connection between the two.

Because women can do anything a man can do. Funny. No man ever felt the need to say he can do anything a woman can do.

Same with minorities. There's so many of them. Billions of minorities around the world. Most of the billions and billions of fast-replicating, impoverished, dollar-a-day people looking to schtupp Europe for a raise... are minorities.

And if the minorities didn't suck, you'd make a fortune going over there to A-freak-a to hire the A-freak-ans.

If the fakenews globalist mainstream media yahoos have it right, then the path to being a billionaire is dead simple.

1) Go to Africa,
2) hire me a bunch of African communist women and
3) Profit. Just sit back and watch the money come pouring in.

Funny that not one of the ultra-rich, Jew-led industrial mega-titans never thought of that. (Except in their diamond mines, of course.)

Even with all their modern technology and genius, the Chinese minorities can't seem to figure it out.

Seems to me like some people quit doing useful work for the day once they've produced about a dollar of value to survive on. That's what it seems like.

Then again, maybe that's because I'm decieved by watching American History X all day, every day with my neckbeard homies who are simultaneously 1) unemployed in their mother's basement and 2) run the world, somehow.

Oh, also, in case you hadn't heard, we're megalomaniacs who don't have anything better to do than to lead a movement. Well, today I'll give you 13 better things I could be doing than being the self-appointed world leader of the WS movement. [See your regional governors and captains for day-to-day WS issues. Thanks.]

To claim we're all powerful and broke is like Hitler being gay and simultaneously not gay. Which one is it? I'm trying to keep my insults straight. Did he imprison the gays like a prudish priest or prance around in a dress? The world needs to know!

Jesus was all powerful and broke and led a successful movement, so maybe these few who forsake worldly wealth have something to say.

If Jesus showed up today, would they even get him a 5 minute slot on Tucker Carlson? I doubt it. Worse than Hitler, that guy. Tossing all the unbelievers into a lake of sulfur? That's anti-semitic talk.

Not like the world knows anything. Britains think it's illegal to carry guns and Americans think it's legal to have pre-marital sex. Could they be more wrong? Oh, sorry. You probably don't know the law. You probably don't know any laws or history unless it came from Hollywood or TV.

But oddly enough, when you dig into any issue, you'll find so consistently that the masses are wrong that you can make a fortune betting against them. In 2008, as told in the Big Short, someone did just that.

I mean, strippers usually have impeccable logic, right? But somehow, when they're financially overleveraged, own 5 houses they can't pay for because they believe a house is your "best investment", it's just barely possible they may be mistaken when it comes to SOME areas of knowledge outside their expertise. #ListenToWomen #MeToo #FreePalestine

Maybe rent out the place, and you'll have yourself an investment.

You want a raise? Increase your value to the marketplace. One way strippers increase their perceived value to the marketplace is to go on tour.

Funny. Rock stars had the same idea. If you're doing the same show for the same crowd, then maybe you've already got all the money someone wants to spend on your particular act.

Ooh. Lookie! A fresh new crop of green stuff pops up when you made them wait awhile for it.

Miley Cyrus moves around. She lasted a week on the Tonight Show. People tuned in to the Apprentice for several seasons, but Trump wasn't on the show for more than a few minutes at the beginning and the end of every show. Why?

He was on tour.

When raising money from bankers, insurance companies, hedge funds, angels and venture capitalists, if you're doing the same schtick in front of the same guy for the 100th time, it's no wonder you've got cash flow problems.

Go on tour!

Usually when the circus comes to town, it doesn't stay there. With some notable exceptions. A fixed-location theme park needs celebrities, excitement, events, and new attractions to keep bringing them in.

Go on tour!

How do you increase your value at work? Do what no one else does so you can say what no one else says. Listen to people no one else listens to so you can learn how to do what no one else does.

It helps to pick a growth industry. When the industry is growing, it's harder to lose money. When it's something you know and understand, it's harder to lose money. When it's a highly profitable commodity, it's harder to lose money.

What industry does Hollywood hate the most? Who do they dump on? Because that might be a VERY promising industry.

They hate, hate, hate car salesmen and car dealerships. Why? There's plenty of money in it. The novice gets a leg up. There are auto dealerships everywhere. You're learning one of life's most valuable skills straight out of high school.

Priceless.

What's worse than a greedy car salesman, according to the movies?

"Greed is good." A greedy stock broker who makes money whether you win or lose.

And what's worse than a stock broker?

Acquisitions company CEO. "I love money," especially "Other Peoples' Money", says Danny DeVito in the movie, Other Peoples' Money.

A role Richard Gere portrayed in Pretty Woman after he went "all the way" in collage.

What's worse than Michael Douglas and Danny DeVito and Richard Gere's rapist mergers and acquisitions attorney played by Jason Alexander?

Oh, I guess it has to be a hedge fund manager or something.

Which almost sounds like I'm saying I want you to be more like Bernie Madoff and Jordan Belfort, the Wolf of Wall Street, guys.

But in a good way.

When I say it now, it sounds like I'm saying, "I want you to strangle puppies, but be a friendly neighborhood puppy strangler, you guys."

Thanks to Hollywood, you'll never believe it's good to...

I.) Borrow OTHER PEOPLES' MONEY to start a business to make a profit. That would be ruthless, evil, and immoral.

In fact, Hollywood has got people so convinced it's hard to borrow money, evil to borrow money that they've stopped listening to Jesus about how easy it is to repay borrowed money.

i.e. My laws are not burdensome. Repay your debts. ...and then... You will lend and not borrow. In other words, you'll invest, lending to companies to grow your talent of gold for you, being a master (of the master race) and angry when they fail to invest the money and grow it.

You'll be angry at the slacking investment bankers, employees, hedge fund managers, etc. who fail to grow the gold you invested. And then the synagogue of Satan will worship at your feet.

A pretty powerful position Satan doesn't want you to have.

II.) Hire a [probably a rapist!!!], blood-sucking acquisitions attorney to help you grow externally, quickly.

Since buying up existing companies, like going on tour, is a lucrative, fast way of growing big by bringing your unique expertise to otherwise failing firms.

Acquisitions works better than consulting, because you don't have to listen to a consultant. But if that same consultant buys your company and takes control, you have to straighten up or you're out.

(This is not good for parasites, who flee like rats from a sinking ship when the company is put under sound management for once.)

III.) Notice the ways in which Hollywood is telling you the truth sometimes, selectively, just so you'll come away believing a lie, anyway.

You might not notice that Danny DeVito is playing a good guy in the movie, fighting the communists, apathy, ego, and weakness. He's installing strength, listening to his nerdy, wimpy, bookish INTPs who know every bit as much about a deal as he does, and probably a lot more. (In the OPM movie, Garfield never would have have given the go-ahead without checking with his analyst first.)

That's acquisitions. Evil, destructive, greedy, money-loving, ruthless psychopaths who are more like Jesus than any 10,000 people you'll ever meet.

GROW MY INVESTMENT OR FEEL THE WRATH OF GOD!

This is literally what Jesus said, in the parable of the talents, paraphrased. A precursor to the Great Commission, which is to go and make disciples. To he who's given much, much will be expected. The truth obligates you.

What's the highest paying gig on the planet?

Being a hedge fund manager ranks somewhere above being an astronaut.

If Hollywood doesn't want you being Danny Devito's character in Other Peoples' Money, fighting commies, having teams of attorneys waging war in the world's third major battlefield, the boardroom, then it must be the right answer.

It scares them. We're with Christ. We're not fighting for capitalism or democracy because we see through that BS, too. If Jesus is our king, and he's only the the king of kings, the few who are saved, not the many, then we're the few, the saved, and the kings when we obey.

And what I'm telling you is this: If Hollywood, the enemy of all mankind, wants you to believe something is wrong, then it therefore must be right.

Look at what happened to Paul Walker. Racing cars gets you killed. Hollywood would have you racing souped-up rice burners and rolling over the top of Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling laying down in the street all romantical in the Notebook.

That's right. They're simultaneously training Vin Diesel fans in theater 11 to spray the blood and guts of the weepy-eyed romantics in theater 7. Meanwhile, your toddlers learning killer wrestling moves from the Hulk and trying them on your infant.

Maybe turn off the pro wrestling.

Do the opposite of what the masses do.

Learn to be responsible with money. It won't make you a chump to have integrity with money, managing companies intelligently.

If Richard Gere (in Pretty Woman) changed his mind about working so hard to tear apart under-performing companies who deserve to die, then the highest-paid thing you can do is be a workaholic who rips apart failing, useless, sick, diseased and deadly infectious companies.

If the "Secret of My Success" (starring Michael J. Fox) is to...

1) Go to college
2) Leave the farm
3) Against his parent's wishes and objections
4) Go to the Jewish-controlled empire of New York City
5) Try to get a job
6) Fall back on nepotism
7) So that you can stalk
8) A Jewish-American princess (Yes. She's Jewish.)
9) And then commit adultery
10) With your boss's wife
11) A Jewess (Yes. She's Jewish, too)
12) To get introduced to the "money men"
13) So you can perfectly execute a head-to-head hostile takeover on the first try based on nothing but what college taught you

Then maybe the real secret of success Brantley Foster doesn't want you to know is this...

1) DON'T go to college. Go to the library.

2) STAY on the farm awhile

3) If you can't even convince your parents  you're a good job candidate, no wonder you're struggling to find employment

4) Stay the hell out of New York

5) Try to get an apprenticeship, vocational schooling. (Actually, the movie does mention this strategy in a positive light. So it's a little suspect.)

6) Fall back on scripture, the foundation of all great success

7) Don't stalk women. Become the kind of guy that's attractive to the right kind of woman, practicing, drilling, rehearsing being unattainable and giving them the opportunity to impress you until you've got the skill to pick the one you want.

8) Get yourselfs a Proverbs wife.

9) Never commit adultery

10) Especially not with the boss's wife. Or anyone else at work. (Especially when you're working on the family farm.)

11) Particularly stay away from dangerous women who don't believe in Jesus and tell you not to worry about being caught.

12) Get yourself surrounded by the kind of people the money men trust most. People who aren't chasing egotistical dreams, but rolling up their sleeves and doing the hard work, making a good impression on the right people.

13) So you can be trusted to launch a multi-billion dollar farm equipment business nobody else wanted to touch, because Cindy Crawford isn't traipsing around braless in a pencil skirt on the mean streets of Manhattan, Kansas.

The Secret of Your Success could be a financially sophisticated high school graduate with a libary card, 16 kids, 160 grandkids, managing 160,000 mob-grazed head of solar-powered, EMP-proof cattle in 16 states for a competitive management fee, with your mom and dad being proud of you.

It's not a rock and roll tour. But it's a 365-date tour with a new crop of grass every day. You might be doing a little better every day than a traveling exotic dancer when you mob graze to double the yeild of the land while increasing topsoil and thereby reversing soil erosion.

In which case, you won't be measuring your success by money anymore, since your lifestyle doesn't change much whether you've got ten million dollars in investments or 100 million.

I don't know what your family will do with their money, but maybe some of them will look at the available opportunities and conclude that the cattle business is the best one going. It was good enough for Abraham.

While people go to the golf course for a little peace, quiet, and pursuit of mastery, your herd on the prairie gives you all that and more.

And then all you have to do to get a raise and increase your value is to add another farmer's 1,000 head of cattle to the herd and increase the acreage you mob graze on.

When you don't have cattle increasing your topsoil for you, plants and farming are hard. But as long as your animals follow the next animal, moving thousands of animals every day is about as easy as moving one animal every day. And then agriculture is a lot easier.

If the numbers work out and the revenues and profits are there, what if you teach your kids and grandkids the business?

You can support a family on 1,000 head of cattle at $20 per month. That's $20,000 per month. Why not teach the kids how. Maybe you'll get a stake in each of their businesses and sit on the board of directors of their cattle-moving business. Or something like that.

I'll bet Michael J. Fox never thought of that.

160 grandkids times about 1,000 head of cattle each times $20 a month comes out to $38,400,000 per year in revenues on land you can lease for free or pretty cheap, if you do it Greg Judy's way.

You don't have to lower your costs anywhere. You've got no competition. Everyone else is fighting tooth and nail for a tiny, filthy, roach-infested apartment that's piled high with garbage in the big city because, according to Hollywood, you can get free sex from the boss's wife.

(Don't get me started on what The Producers promises you can get from an active sex life on Broadway.)

Doing it the farmer's way kinda sounds like a secret of success to me. No Cindy Crawfish, though. Too bad. Turns out the supermodel types just sorta lay there. Like a dead fish.

The pretty girls never had to work for it, so they don't. And I'm not a necropheliac myself, but you can do what you want.

Get yourself a woman with strong arms instead. Because pretty women tend to be a lot uglier without their makeup team and hairdressing department.

Speaking of Pretty Women, becoming a hooker in hopes of dating a Jew in a Lotus (Mr. Lewis in Pretty Woman) isn't that reliable of a life plan, either.

I guess the only reason to do it Hollywood's way is so you can commit adultery with the seed-stealing children of the devil. Maybe it's not that great a deal.

You don't want to be stepping over acres of diamonds every day and not realize the "money" was in your own backyard all along.

Then again, cattle ranchers don't usually make movies, take over entertainment and news media businesses and music distribution companies to let everyone know what it's really like to be successful.

While everyone else is playing with paper dirivatives of derivatives of commodities, the cattle rancher has all the derivatives he wants, the commodities, the genetics, the truth, the way, and the life. And has it more abundantly.

Comments